As a Catholic, I am facing one of the greatest tests that I could ever imagine. It seems I'm constantly hearing about incident after incident of priests committing the gravest of sins- the sexual abuse of a child.

And, if this wasn’t enough to handle, other information has been revealed which is equally as horrible- that the hierarchy of the Church, knowing of the sexual histories of these priests, convince the victims and their families that everything will be taken care of internally. After swearing them to silence by paying them huge sums of  “hush” money, the bishops simply move the priests to other parishes. Perhaps the priest is sent temporarily to a “rehabilitation” center for therapy, but as soon as the counselor says they have been cured, they are reassigned to continue their ministry and ultimately their predatory behaviors. Speaking from a psychological perspective, I don’t believe that one can be rehabilitated from this disorder. This is a serious sexual deviancy, and while you may be able to find a way to suppress the behavior temporarily, the desire remains, and ultimately, the behavior returns. This has been seen in the cases of these priests, who do continue abusing child after child—despite “counseling”.

Some people believe that this whole situation has arisen due to the fact that priests are required by the Church to be celibate. This viewpoint makes me insane! Celibacy in and of itself is NOT the reason for the sexual abuse in the Church. Simply going without sex for prolonged periods of time does not make you desire little children…. especially those of your own gender! If celibacy alone were truly the issue, then these priests would be having affairs with adult women, not young boys and teens. If celibacy plays any kind of role, it is that it is part of the entire structure of the priesthood, which creates an ideal setting for those with these tendencies to “hide”. Being that the church requires celibacy, there is no explanation necessary as to why they are not married. Also, the priesthood traditionally has been a position of power and authority, and for a long time, priests were completely trusted by parents and children. Churches usually are associated with schools, and/or youth activities, not to mention the altar boys… giving these men easy access to children. I have even heard stories of the abuses taking place right in the sanctuary and confessionals! It’s surreal!

Other people believe this is a homosexual problem. I disagree with that as well. I can fully understand that the structure of the priesthood may appeal to those who are “closeted”, again, because they aren’t expected to marry, and therefore don’t have to explain being single their entire lives. But again- if it were simply a homosexual issue, these priests would be having affairs with other adult men, not boys. Those who say that merely because someone is homosexual, they will prey on young boys are just plain wrong. To say that, then you would also have to conclude that all heterosexual men would prey on young girls. Homosexuals by nature are not pedophiles. They are two distinct things. Pedophilia (or adult-minor sexuality) as a mental disorder, can take different forms: homosexual; heterosexual; and bi-sexual. These are subtypes of the disorder. They are pedophiles first- then their particular sexual orientation guides the direction of their behavior. Personally, I believe that all of the elements I mentioned above regarding the structure of the priesthood have contributed to this situation…. not simply being horny or gay. Pedophiles take advantage of this setting, using it as a haven, which enables them to indulge their desires.

Now what is also saddening is that at this point, when these acts have been discovered, they are kept quiet. The Church (being more of a political body than a religious one) has a history of doing whatever it takes to “protect” itself from scandal. The idea that bishops and priests put the priority of protecting the institution over the protection of children is beyond reproach. And truly, I believe that the only reason they are now making bold statements about “zero tolerance” and correcting and reforming these wrongs, is because they were caught. Had the media not shed light on these crimes and abuses, I believe they would have continued in the way they always have…priests looking the other way, and bishops “moving the problem” to another parish. And all the while, children would be suffering.

This is evil personified which has infiltrated the Church from within, and has permeated to almost all levels. It is a cancer that needs to be purged. I feel the Holy Father should be as strict as possible and make a clean sweep of those that are in any way involved in this behavior, or who have made decisions, which perpetuated it. Priests and religious make a vow of service and commitment to God. Included in this, is a vow of celibacy. If these men sincerely want to be priests and religious, they need to honor their vows and live their lives according to the example of Christ. What is also disheartening is that all of the truly good priests and religious will also bear the stigma of this evil, being stereotyped as predators through no fault of their own. Many parishioners will choose to leave the Church. I have to admit that I have also, at times, contemplated whether or not I could remain affiliated with an institution that would put the safety of children second to their own political agendas, and show contrition only after being “caught”. But I have to remember that it is not the Catholic faith itself that is an issue here; it is the earthly institution, run by men, which is seriously defective.

For now, I will watch to see the effects of the changes currently being made. I pray that these changes will be swift and hard hitting, so that not another child will ever have to endure the pain, and loss of innocence, inflicted upon them by those who are supposed to be holy men, representatives of Christ on Earth- men who are supposed to protect children, not hurt them. I want these changes to ensure that these men are completely removed from the priesthood, and prosecuted to fullest extent of the law. Of course, I wouldn’t argue with a good old-fashioned excommunication either! I will also pray that my faith remains strong, and that I remember what I have always told other people, “…look above the altar- that is where your faith should lie.”